Posted in Associate/Youth Pastor's Wife

On being the 2nd Man’s Wife

     This is a beginning to a new journey for me.  I asked permission from my pastor and his wife months ago about writing a book for Associate and/or Youth pastor wives.  They both agreed it would be a good idea and beneficial.  As the year has gone on I’ve realized that sitting down to write a book is not going to happen anytime soon with our schedule.  However, my husband has been an encouragement in my starting a blog.
     A few years ago our pastor’s wife took our outreach minister’s wife and myself to a pastor’s wive’s retreat.  We were all three surprised with some of the responses coming from other pastor’s wives.  One said hesitatntly,  “well…I guess it’s ok that they’re here”  as if we were infiltrating their top secret territory.  Another said, “the assoc. wives are the one’s I’m trying to retreat from.”  We didn’t get that.  Thankfully, at our church the staff is pretty close and  our husband’s share in ministerial duties.  However, I’ve realized that is not the case everywhere.  I’ve even heard some horror stories of relationships between senior pastor wives and their associates’ wives.  This isn’t how it should be.
       It intrigues me to search into this idea of an Associate pastor.  My husband isn’t called (at least not currently) to the senior pastorate.  However, he makes a great  2nd man, supporting the pastor and his ministry while having the freedom to be in charge of various ministries in the church including the Youth Department.  I love and totally support this.  However, it does look like I’ll be in the musty cabins and bunkbeds of camp  for the rest of my future while my senior pastor’s wife will get the cushy, private accomodations.  Oh well, I’ll also get the opportunity to stay young at heart. Anyone else with me on this?

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