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The Cookie

Posted on August 14, 2013 by jenschuyler

There are some days when I look at my kids and ask myself, “Who are these people?” I know it sounds odd, but truly it’s my aim, my goal, my purpose in life to mold these three precious lives into characters unrecognizable to my flawed self. When 2^nd Man and I pray for them, he often says something to the effect of them standing on his shoulders and using us as a springboard to go further in their lives, namely their spiritual lives. It is truly why I stay at home and…well…ahem…don’t work (said as I stuff a bon-bon in my mouth and change the television channel. Just kidding, I don’t eat my bon-bons in front of the TV). Seriously, though, we do have very high hopes for our children’s’ spiritual walks and their lives in general as well.

Now, that sounded pretty highfalutin and noble didn’t it? But, the little things these kids do even amaze me sometimes. Take for instance the cookies Jarod got at a restaurant the other night. We took some missionaries out for dinner after Sunday evening church. It was probably 7:30 when we went and we didn’t get out of there until almost 10:00! But that’s probably another blog post about the poor service industry of our town. Anyway, with it being so late, we had him wait to eat the cookies until Monday. I told him he could have them as a snack since it was the first day of school. Now, before I tell you what happened let me preface this by saying,

these two cookies which look very much like this picture,were only the size of dollar coins, they were not those big ‘ol honkin kind. So I was shocked when he looked at me and said, “I’ll just have one.” What? WHO DOES THAT?!

I responded coolly though, so he wouldn’t catch on to my shock. When he asked what to do with the other one I told him to set it on a napkin on the kitchen table and he could have it later if he wanted it. As I walked by it all day long I kept sniffing and thinking, “man, I could down that in single chew.” If you’re wondering – no, I didn’t eat my kid’s cookie.

Later, though, as I was doing dishes and pondering the oddity of one of my offspring having such self discipline I went down my panic road thinking, “Oh no, he’s going to be one of those no hormone, no sympathy smart- alecks who respond to diet articles with quips like ‘It’s easy all you fat people, just eat healthy food and stop shoving sugar in your mouth!’ or something completely insensitive like that.” I usually save this kind of momma panic for when one of my children misbehave and I send them down the aimless road to living in the gutter in my mind.

When I told 2^nd man about it he didn’t think anything of it. “You’re not alarmed?” I pressed. “No, this is a good thing you know,” he said. “But how does a person do that? I mean, how does a person eat only one dollar sized cookie and think that’s enough? I think it’s weird. Do you think he’s sick?” 2^nd man really wasn’t amused. “You know honey, it’s called self-discipline.” “Our seven year old son – self disciplined? Nah.” I said as images of this same boy yelling, jumping, and swinging from stairway posts in the church gym by a rope flashed through my mind. “Well, maybe at least in one area he’s becoming disciplined.” 2^nd man replied.

I guess he’s right. It is a good thing. Unfortunately, I think my girls were born with momma’s hungry hormones. Hopefully, they’ll learn from little brother in this area. Hopefully, I’ll learn from their little brother in this area.

Decorating, My Interests, Uncategorized

A Summer of Weddings Part II

Posted on August 2, 2013 by jenschuyler

Ok, so it’s been a year – yes a full year since my summer of weddings. That summer turned into a year and six weddings later with a 7th on the way. I’m not sure how this all came about, but for now I’m going with it. For memory’s sake though, I’d like to look at wedding number two from last summer. My second wedding happened to be the wedding of our Pastor’s second son. This was the day of Sam Waterloo and Sarah Graham.

Back when 2nd man and I first came to OK, I taught 5th/6th grades at the local Christian school. That’s when I first experienced Sam Waterloo. The quirky, ultra-polite, pleaser son in the Waterloo clan. He was a treasure for sure. The school shut down as he was going into 6th grade and I was soon to have our first child, so I home schooled Sam that next year. I’m pretty sure it was the most excruciating year for this people pleasing kid who had to sit through the hormonal pitfalls that accompany new moms. I remember someone coming to the door one day and I had to put Katie down somewhere. “Here Sam, can you hold her a minute?” I asked quickly. His response went something like, “uh, uh, ooh, oh, um…” “nevermind Sam.” I put the crying child in her bassinet and went on with business.

Well, long gone are the days of hesitation. I like to think I maybe pushed him to a brink that brought out some boldness. Oh, it was many years later until he finally achieved manly boldness, but I played a small part and that makes me smile. Sam went through highschool and college being one of those guys that everyone likes. You really can’t not like him. He’s just sweet, kind and genuinely loves the Lord. Right after highschool he decided to pursue Sarah Graham. She was a beautiful, smart and sophisticated young woman who also went through our youth department. (I don’t excel in any of those qualities, so all the credit there must go to her parents – wish I could’ve been a better influence.) Anyway, they were going to separate colleges and the pressure of long distance accompanied by other factors put a stall on the relationship, so they called it off almost as quickly as it had begun, much to the chagrin of Sam’s mother. Through those years she didn’t give up hope though both of them seemed to be moving on with life. She was almost as in love with Sarah as Sam had been in a weird mother-picking her daughter-in-law kinda way. Well, her praying payed off and they found themselves reuniting after college. It’s more their story to tell, but lets just say that this friendly, unassuming youth pastor has a bold, “I wanna marry you” “you gotta be mine” side. Gives me chills really.

So, again, I found myself honored to be a part of their wedding. This one was a vintage wedding filled with nostalgic memories and literary nods. They chose to do the “first sight” picture before the wedding. The wedding party and I were all bawling at the back of the sanctuary windows as she handed him a box of letters she had written throughout her teen years to her future husband. Many in which she had pictured Sam as their receiver.

In the ceremony they had taken a large photo of the two of them and made it into a puzzle. They had asked several people (2nd man and I included) to place a piece of the puzzle on an easle while Pastor read a letter they had written about how each person or couple represented inluences in their lives be it friendship, spiritual leadership, etc. It was truly moving. Then Sarah walked down the aisle to the music played in Jane Austin’s Sense and Sensibility (which is so cool since that whole story includes the love story of a friendly unassuming clergyman and a young woman who tries to handle things right and it looks like they won’t make it and then they do…((breathe)) ok I’ll stop walking you through it now.)

Anyway, I had so much fun with this one. We rented chairs, set up lacy tablecloths, and made the church gym into a retro picnic feel with an ice cream bar and glass bottles of pop. It was a sweet affair all the way around including the extra hundred people we weren’t quite prepared for (but that’s a memory we won’t delve into here).

The work was hard, the pressure high, but the honor was out of this world!

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Momma Metamorphosis

Posted on March 20, 2012February 2, 2013 by jenschuyler

We recently had pictures taken for our church directory. I must vainly admit, I was kind of excited this time. I recently lost some weight and was finally up to getting a family picture that included myself (not just me taking the picture of everyone else because I didn’t want to be seen). However, when we went in to view the pictures what I saw wasn’t what I expected. Don’t get me wrong by that last sentence, it’s not that what I saw was bad…just unexpected. It was then that I had my final step of my momma metamorphosis. Yes, others can relate I’m sure. That moment in time when you realize (and accept) that you have turned into your mother.

I was trying to relay this to my mom and I’m not sure she took it as well as I would have liked her too. I think she thought I was complaining. But, this isn’t like stage 1 of the momma metamorphosis. That takes place when you’re a teenage girl. Highly critical of your own mother, usually without any sound arguments, but told by everyone around that you look just like her. I got over that one a long time ago.

It’s a funny thing, the whole mother/daughter dynamic. I was thinking about it recently while teaching the teen girls in our youth department. I was talking about looks and where they should be on the priority scale of our lives. I told them to look at their own mothers and realize that was most likely their genetic future. Again, this sounds like I’m saying it in some doom and gloom negative way, but I’m really not. I think it’s a step toward growing up. I’m 38 now; don’t ya think it’s time? As a teenager and even into our twenties, we think and are told that we’re like a special snowflake that is the prettiest snowflake around and there are no other snowflakes like us (some days it’s the ugliest too depending on the mood we’re in.) But, it seems were never just a snowflake in a long line of snowflakes with similar genetic dispositions. So as our snowflakeness ages we go through this whole argument of not wanting to be like anyone else but just bask in the glow of our special flakeness thinking the world revolves around us.

Then somewhere in our mid to upper twenties we find ourselves in a bookstore trying to check out. As we dig through the messy abyss full of receipts and gum wrappers searching for a wallet that we know is in there the thought hits us like the Mac daddy of all de ja vu moments…”I am my mother! I’ve seen this purse before. I’ve criticized this purse before wondering who in their right mind would let their purse get this way!” Oh wait…maybe that was just me. It’s still a little hard to take it then, the whole momma metamorphosis. One still hasn’t admitted that they look like her and is hoping that this “bookstore moment” is just a quick one-time thing.

Onward into the thirties the truth starts setting in. As we start saying things to our children that we swore we’d never say. You know those things when we got in trouble and sat awaiting punishment on our bed and making deals with our future selves about never treating our kids that way. Well, then you catch yourself and think, “Hmmm maybe mom was onto something then.” Or when you find yourself riding your kids when company is coming over. I remember thinking; “this woman rides us like a Chinese sweatshop whenever anyone comes over. What’s the big deal?” Then, as I crack the whip on my own little sweatshop workers I catch myself for a moment and think “am I her?”

It was in these past few years that I started appreciating this more and more. I even set about trying to hone in on my momma’s best qualities (at least how I saw them as best). This is a woman who can meet someone and have his or her life story 15 minutes later and walk away having made him or her feel like the most special and interesting person in the world. Somehow, people just feel comfortable around her. They open up and just spill their guts. That’s a good thing though. I’d love it if I could make those around me feel special and comfortable the way she does. I’m still hoping I get that one.

She and I took a trip to New York City once, while I was in college. Everyone told us not to look anyone in the eye. As if all New Yorkers had a Medusa quality that would turn us to stone or that they’re all waiting to steal our wallet but this will only happen if we look at them. However, in their defense, this seems to be the only advice small town folk know to give to other small town folk going to the big city. Well, before we left the airport to get our first cab momma had to make a pit stop. I told her I’d wait with the luggage. After a while I started to get worried. Maybe a New Yorker got her in the bathroom! Was she turned to stone…or worse…mugged! No, she was talking to some diabetic woman who was giving herself a blood sugar check. Momma had a full health screening done within a 5-minute trip to the bathroom. This proved helpful later in the trip. Fearless momma had tips from the locals that saved us a bundle! Why, as emotionally moving as the ferry ride to the Statue of Liberty is, I remember it more for how much valuable information Momma was able to obtain about getting around town from a local lady taking a friend out to see Lady Liberty.

Just this week I found myself doing the bold kind of things that she does. 2^nd man had thrown out my branches! After chopping down a huge tree in our front yard this year, I saved back some branches to make wedding trees for a bride I’m helping. I’ve been saving them for months and one day last week I stepped outside to work on them and noticed they were gone. He had been trying to help me by cleaning up the yard. I panicked for a few moments and then set about to get new branches. As it turned out a family not far from us had also chopped down a tree and had a familiar pile of branches in their side yard. So I made like momma and piled the kids in the car and knocked on a complete strangers door. A girl that looked like Snooki answered the door and I introduced myself and told her my predicament. As my kids sat crouching down and hiding in the truck, she laughed and told me I could have whatever I wanted. See that wasn’t so hard was it? But I remember crouching down in the car a few times myself as a kid. As I backed out of her driveway, I had another momma metamorphosis moment.

So, it wasn’t with regret that I noticed myself looking like my momma in those pictures. I think (and I believe others do to) that she’s quite beautiful. It was more of an acceptance moment for who I am and where I came from.

I wonder if my daughters will take it as well?

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Prayer

Posted on December 9, 2011 by jenschuyler

Need lots of prayers today. Haven’t posted in while and will explain soon. But for now, we need lots of prayer power for today. It’s so exciting to know God is working something out through or for you. I’m humbled by the attention even if it is stretching my faith. He’s already in my tomorrow!!

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Blog Layout Changes

Posted on February 17, 2011 by jenschuyler

Hey friends, sorry about the seemingly constant changes to this blog site. Although I have a tendency to constantly rearrange my furniture at home and buy new purses with each season, it’s not my desire to confuse my readers. I’m new to this blogging thing and as time goes on I keep learning new things to make it a little better. I’m hoping not to keep making such dramatic changes to the layout (though I can’t promise no change to color and decor..wink wink). Please hang with me, I’m enjoying the process and hope you are enjoying the thoughts.