For the first time in the fourteen years we’ve been at this church 2nd man is allowing me to teach the young ladies in our Wednesday night class. I’m all, “boy oh boy oh boy oh boy.” (In hyper panting tones with hands rubbing together.) I think they’re all “boy oh boy oh boy oh boy,” (in long drawn out tones with hands rubbing down face as heads shake back and forth). What’s funny is that with all this info. I’ve been waiting to share; I’m having such a hard time pairing things down into single lesson formats without cramming everything I know into one 30-minute lesson.
I thought I’d include some general highlights of what I’ve been teaching in my blog for any curious parents or even other youth pastor wives who would like to compare notes or share critiques. Whatever category you may fall into, feel free to share what you think. I’d love to hear about it…well, I think I’d love to hear about it. I’ve been using two books primarily: Secrets About Guys that shouldn’t be secrets by Grace Dove and For Young Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa A. Rice.
The first week I simply started by sharing my testimony. Many of the girls had heard the story of how 2nd man and I got together as he’s told it like a bazillion times. However, not many have ever gotten to hear it from my point of view, or about my teen years. I remember as a teen meeting people in ministry thinking that they had no clue what real humans went through and therefore were rendered useless as informants for life. My desire with week one was to let the girls see and hear about the “real” me baggage and all. I want them to realize that I’m real, I’ve messed up, and I’ve straightened up (only by God’s grace) and that choosing God’s path is far more worth it than any paths of regret that may present themselves as fun along the way.
I might add here that I have a little teacher’s wonderland thing going on in my head that pictures me giving lessons and young women on the edge of their seats waiting for more and wondering what more I can tell them to get them on the right path. Lives being changed and repentant young women getting right with the Lord like a curling ribbon spool coming unraveled…uncontainable revival…unstoppable excitement….
Well, in reality it’s more like an unlikely event. Instead, I had one table of girls on night one who were giggling at one point, but so nicely informed me that they weren’t laughing at me, just having their own conversation. To my side I can feel the eyeballs of one girl who keeps rolling them up into her head at my comments every week. I think they might get stuck there. It kind of gives me a headache right behind my own eyes just imagining it. Then there are the others who don’t put their phones down. To this my thoughts are…”really? I mean I can see you ya know.” I know teens today are able to multi-task and hear me too, but I’m much too simple minded to be undistracted.
Anyway, I know some are listening and as I told another youth pastor’s wife recently, my hope is to haunt them. I remember not wanting to hear what my own youth pastor’s wife had to say (who I am now related to and love dearly…ah the irony. be careful who you don’t want to listen to chuckle chuckle) however, her words did sink in somehow and someway and haunted me all through my rebellious years of high school. I know, of course, this was the Holy Spirit using her to haunt me, but nevertheless she was an ever-present presence. So, this is my hope. If you can’t win them – haunt them. 🙂
Week two, I taught on how guys love mystery, which spilled into weeks three and four entailing modesty and beauty. Sometimes I wish the moms were in the class too, just so I could hear what their thoughts on the matters are. I would just love it in a perfect world if they could be there and we could all be backing each other up in the Lord so to speak. You see, here in Oklahoma it’s not ladylikeness isn’t really encouraged much. I’m considered quite the fuddy duddy since I’m anti burping contests in the presence of guys. I was personally delighted to find out from our own teen guys, while interviewing them, that they actually don’t like that all that much and though they laugh, they’re not attracted. Woo hoo! That’s one for Miss Jenny! (Said with all the modesty and humbleness I could muster of course.)
We’ve covered points such as how mystery is created through concealing not revealing our bodies and our thoughts. How it isn’t necessary to say everything we think no show everything naturally possess. We also discussed how it is important to fix ourselves up a bit as guys really appreciate this. The whole “wal mart in your pajamas” scene is no a pretty one and I find it my own personal mission to put a stop to it with any young girls under my influence.
It is my prayer that the girls will have listened as I covered many more points as well. If you are one of my moms reading this post, feel free to get the notes from me if you’re curious. 2nd man and I always try to steer teens back home in our counsel and teaching, so I’m hoping that I’m on the same page with the moms of our teens as I’ve told them to go home and discuss it.
I’m now coming up on week five and wondering what to teach on this week. I’m praying that the Lord reveals in a real and distinct way which lesson he’d have me to teach on so that it would be beneficial to these young ladies. I’m impressed on their desire to do right. Now we just need them to act on those good desires, always remembering “They’re not yet who they’re going to be.”
2ndmanswife 